I was listening to a comedy sketch one morning and the speaker was making fun of people who refill their mega-sized water jugs at the local grocery. Mimicking them, he proudly and staunchly said, ”Look at me I’m sophisticated. I drink purer water than everyone else.” My family may get grocery water every week but we don’t flaunt it around like that. We just want to drink something clean and tasteless.

A couple of weeks ago, I filled our three 5-gallon water jugs as usual. But this time, in this hot summer heat, it was just unbearable for me! It didn’t help that I was roasting under the mid-afternoon sun. Even though my kids were there to help me, it was still bad. I felt like a frustrated Lynette!

Later on, I thought about those special faucets at medical facilities. You see them in pharmacies, hospitals, clinics, doctor’s offices, etc. Above the sink, there is a faucet with regular tap water for washing hands and what not. However, on the side, there is sometimes a smaller faucet with lower-pressured purified water. It suddenly occurred to me that there was nothing in the way of having the same installation on my very own kitchen sink!

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Bree: “You don’t have to wash those. I already did them.”
Orson: “Oh, I found some streaks. So, I’m wiping them down with undiluted red wine vinegar.”
Bree: “I’ve never heard of that.”
Orson: “Oh, sure. And for tougher spots I use a fifty-fifty mix of denatured alcohol and water. And for those really intractable stains, I mean, we’re talking shower doors, I wipe on laquer thinner with a towel.”
Bree is breathing heavily and staring at Orson.
Orson: “Bree?”
Bree grabs Orson and kisses him passionately. She drags him into the bedroom. The kitchen faucet is still on.

As much as I love the beauty and simplicity glass, I hate how hard it is to clean it. Its like you have to go an extra mile to ensure that there are no streaks! Since we don’t own wineglasses at home, I can’t really try what Orson recommends. I certainly will if we ever do buy a set! I’m not sure if his suggestions can be applied to glass windows, mirrors, and tabletops. But, I already know a method of cleaning glass without streaks. It certainly won’t make your significant other horny but it will definitely get rid of your streaks! The secret is in two components, newspaper and vinegar.

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In episode 2.02, Lynette was having some convincing Tom that the house was a mess and that his “great system” didn’t work. Every time she pointed it out, Tom let her know that she was no longer in charge of the house, it was his responsibility, and she should not boss him around.

Normally Lynette would have spent a sleepless night telling herself she didn’t have control issues. But she couldn’t. She was too busy figuring out how to bend Tom to her will.

-Episode 02.02 - You Could Drive a Person Crazy

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